Misery Loves Company & Advice for Aspiring Parents

Two out of three days this week I spent in the company of other mothers and their small children. Being a mother is not miserable. There are definite stages of misery. These stages usually correspond to some developmental occurrence: walking, talking, teething, eating, sleeping through the night, not shitting on the carpet (uh, no names). Spending time with other mothers eases these difficulties. You realize you are not alone and your child gets to play with someone all at the same time.

I told one friend, "Next week you guys can come to my house for screaming and fighting, OK?" That about sums it up sometimes.

Now. Some advice. If you ever speak of your child's sleeping habits--no matter how proud or disinterested-yet-appreciative you are--lie. Because the moment you say anything positive the sleeping fairies will tweak and poke your child all night. You will rue the day you ever thought of encouraging your friend in with their child's sleeping difficulties. You will arise the next day with aching muscles and tired lids and curse the fact that you said, "Yes. My child sleeps."

For the record: My children don't sleep. They are up all night. I'm always tired. And it sux.