I passed on some baby items to an expecting mother today. These were things that are deemed somewhat "essential" if you have babies or plan on having them. It felt like some sort of concession. Like I was saying, "OK. This stage in my life is over. You may have these now." I don't know if that's what anyone would actually think, but I wanted to make sure that I expressed somewhere the fact that I don't want to be done having babies. I would welcome more.
It feels abnormal to admit this fact. I feel like a lot of people have a certain number of children that they want and once this number is fulfilled they are "done." Honestly, I cannot imagine. With each child that has been given to us it is more and more possible for me to imagine having another. In fact, I do not look forward to the day that it is possible that I will not have another.
Why did I pass on the baby items then? In addition to the fact that I am more and more open to another baby with each one we're given I'm more and more aware of how few baby items you actually need. It's easier for me to take John into the shower with me, or wash him in the sink. And soon enough it will be possible to put him in the tub with a sister or two. I don't have the room for lots of gear. That's it.