It's 2:15 on December something 2009 and I just went outside for the first time today. It's the most wonderful time of the year hear in the PHX. Why did I just now bother on going out? Well, I just woke up!
Just woke up from a nap. Just woke up from a nap because I have to lay down with children to get them to sleep/stay asleep/not wake up siblings. It's really complicated and all. It's quite nice, too. I think I've taken a nap every day in the last four years. I can't complain about that. I manage to somehow.
I have it in my mind that there are SO MANY OTHER things that I need to GET DONE NOW! (or yesterday!!!). Like what? Like clean my stuff, rearrange it and throw out the extra stuff.
Then I lay in bed nursing little Rowena and parts of that little embroidered poem come to mind: cobwebs and something take a sleep (or something) because I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep. And ain't that the truth?
Why do I create these deadlines for myself? Why do I impose such strict standards of organized chaos? Is it so my children enjoy themselves? They seem to enjoy themselves anyway. Is it for my husband? He doesn't enjoy things when I'm stressed out, so no to that to.
I guess I just don't want to be judged. Tis true. I think people will think I'm lazy if I have a messy house. Or they'll think I'm tasteless if I have simple decor. Or they'll think I'm uncreative if I'm not making cool stuff all the time.
I know I'm none of those things. Our family is happier when I focus on the essentials of homekeeping and enjoy everyone the rest of the time so that's why I try not to feel bad about having just now stepped out my door to the beautiful day outside instead of sallying forth on an excellent outside adventure in order to capitalize on every moment of the day!
I was feeding, dressing, watching and talking with my little girls all day. They were playing babies and kitchen (ironically) and having fun doing it. I had fun watching. Then we all ate lunch and took naps. Sounds like a good day to me.
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1 comment:
i love it- naps, just being & your honesty.
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